Never Barter with a Viking
by Toriblue
Summary: They had cautioned against accepting the invitation. Their caution only made the jewelry shine brighter.


This little vignette disregards almost all of season four. All ya' need to know...  
Rebekah did kill/turn Elena and at some point, Elijah offered Elena  
his blood because ancient blood has more power (allows vampires to go without  
feeding for longer periods of time). It's remarkably easy to disregard the  
canon of TVD...the writers do it all the time.

* * *

One stilted phone call later, she fishes the platinum bracelet  
and gold-embossed card from the garbage.

They had cautioned against accepting the invitation. Their  
caution only made the jewelry shine brighter.

Someone old...some_ thing_ powerful...  
She had been seen. She had been chosen.

Independence. The possibility of casting off the chains for as  
long as six months.

Flesh and blood (The older the better)...one for the other. As  
she stands in front of the mirror, she considers her value on  
the open market.

* * *

The invitation gains her admission but the bracelet comes with a  
fairy godfather.

"Talk off your clothes." She doesn't argue. This is his job...it  
might be his entire life.

He's pleased with the raw material he's been given.  
"Gorgeous breasts. That ass is a work of art."

Nope...a forgery. The original masterpiece was destroyed  
over a thousand years ago. The joke's on her so she doesn't  
bother to share it.

* * *

She's buffed to a high shine and coated in raspberries and  
chocolate. The lotion is appropriate. She smells like an over-  
priced dessert.

The deep v-cut and cat eyes will keep her from looking virginal  
but it's still too bride-like for her tastes.

"I don't want to wear white."

"It's not like you'll be wearing it for very long."

* * *

She looks nothing like a bride.

"You turned me into a Queen."

"I'm just hair and make-up. Your benefactor chose the dress."

"Why would he drape me in silk and rubies? This is supposed to  
be a fling."

"Does it matter? At least he or she has good taste." Maybe.  
She won't know until she takes a bite.

* * *

"No."

"You already agreed."

"Under false pretenses!"

"No one lied to you. You chose to believe you were dealing with a  
stranger. If your participation hinged on the identity of your  
partner, you shouldn't have agreed to anonymity."

"You knew what I'd assume. Presenting it as an exchange was just  
your way of throwing me off the scent."

"It's custom for the invitations to be issued anonymously. That  
being said, you had the option of requesting additional  
information...a picture, at the very least."

"How was I supposed to know that? Prostitutes aren't supposed to  
care about looks."

"If you found the offer so distasteful, why did you accept it?"

"I didn't find it distasteful. I'm just calling a spade a spade.  
Requesting blood instead of money doesn't make me any less of a  
whore."

"We're both bartering away our bodily fluids. Which one of us is  
the whore?"

"Fine...we're both morally bankrupt. I'm still not taking your  
blood."

"There is no blood on earth more potent than my own."

"We already had this conversation...I'm sure you remember it."

"I remember your charming use of expletives. Is your pride still  
worth more than your freedom?"

"If this was about pride, I wouldn't have agreed to peddle my  
booty."

"Than what, pray tell, is this about?"

"You tell me. It's not my guilt complex that brought us here."

"If you believe that's the emotion that brought us here, you have  
not been paying attention."

"Unless you've started offering your blood to all newbie  
vampires, guilt is definitely the guest of honor at this shindig.

"My blood is yours, Elena but my reasons are my own."

"You can keep them both." That statement would've been so  
much more impressive if it had paved her exit.

"The door is magically sealed. Did you skim that part of the  
contract?"

"Right...twenty-four hours."

"Have you learned any new expletives in the last ten years?"

"Why? Am I going to need them?"

"I imagine you will. The contract provides a time frame for the  
exchange but the clock doesn't start until the exchange begins.  
The seal won't break..."

"Until the exchange is completed." It's her mistake but it would've  
cost her nothing if he was the stranger he was supposed to be.

"The door won't open unless I take your blood?"

"The door won't open unless all of the terms are met." His slight  
emphasis on the word 'all' feels like a warning.

"There has to be some way around that part of the contract." He  
probably drafted the damn thing. She knows he's determined to  
make amends but the rest of it...there has to be some wiggle room.

"That particular section of the contract isn't open to  
interpretation. If you recall, you were very specific as to what  
you would and would not do. It was quite an enlightening  
read, actually." There wasn't much in the 'would not do' column.  
Does he think she's a complete freak?

"Didn't you add your own amendment? You're too smart to have left  
yourself with no loopholes."

"Why would I attempt to avoid any part of the exchange? I was the one who  
suggested it."

"There has to be something else that I can give you."

"There's nothing else that I want." Well...that's a conversation ender.

"If you wanted to get in my pants, you could've suggested dinner and a movie."

"I'd say dinner is covered."

"Why are you so determined to feed your blood to me?"

"I'm determined to share everything with you. My blood is just a part of the  
package." He keeps finding new ways to knock the breath from her body.  
How is she going to survive all the touching?

"Does the package include clothing and jewelry? I feel like I should be on my  
way to the Oscars."

"I considered providing _just_ the jewelry. How long do you think this  
conversation would've lasted if you had been wearing nothing but that  
rope of rubies?"

"Oh please...as soon as I realized it was you, I would've turned that bed sheet  
into a toga!" She gets a smile but not the one she was hoping for.

"Remove the dress."

"After you."

Note to self: asking a Viking to strip is not an effective stalling tactic.

* * *

**_THE END_**


End file.
